As another posting season approaches, our fifth move in ten years, we find ourselves preparing to move back to Ottawa from an OUTCAN posting in London, UK. I feel the familiar mix of “posting” emotions return: excitement at going home to Canada to friends and family and for the start of a new adventure; some apprehension at the amount of work that will be required of us to execute the move; mild annoyance at having to deal with BGRS; and sadness at having to leave this island we have come to love and having to say goodbye to the wonderful friends we’ve made here. Four years here have given us the necessary time to properly put down roots. And it is with true bittersweetness that we now have to uproot ourselves yet again.
This move, after four years in the UK, feels particularly loaded not only because it’s the longest posting we’ve had or because we have truly loved life in the UK; moving feels more difficult this year because we will be doing it in the midst of a pandemic. As the worries and what-ifs of how we will get through it crowd in, I find myself wanting to feel resentful and angry that we have no choice but are "made" to do it! How will our children cope in isolation for 14 days (more importantly, how will my husband and I survive being locked into a hotel room with three kids)? What happens if we have to start our 14-day quarantine all over again if any of us gets a positive COVID test result during our return? Will our furniture and effects arrive in time for us to get settled into our home before the kids start school in September and I return to full-time work? It’s easy to go down a rabbit hole with this line of thinking and to feel the weight of the overwhelming task that is ahead of us.
And yet, I know that we are strong enough and resilient enough to get through it. When we moved here four years ago, our youngest of three was only seven months old. My husband and I each lost a parent unexpectedly during our first six months here. We had no support network, no friends and were living in a busy city where life seemed to just pass us by. We got through it, however, one day at a time, and are a stronger family for it. My kids are close to one another and are truly each other’s best friends. My husband and I have learned to face challenges with strength and teamwork and have learned to forgive ourselves and each other when we are not at our best. We are returning home stronger and full of life experiences that have made us better people. So, while the move this summer might be a difficult one, it might also be another challenge that fortifies us by showing us what we can handle when we face it head-on, step by step and one day at a time.
By Roksana Cylupa